I'm Back!

It has been almost a year since I updated my blog. Was I THAT busy? Ha prob not. Or did I run out of things to say about my adventures? Nope, not really the case either.  I can honestly say that I have more stories than I remember and I know I will be kicking myself in years to come for not blogging/journaling as much as I should have during my time here.

With that being said my time is quickly coming to an end. With my COS (close of service) conference just around the corner I think it’s about time to reflect on what I have done or have failed to do during my time here…

One thing I can proudly say I have done is integrated myself in my community. I know most of the people in my tiny little village and they know me by name (not just ‘mzungu’). Although it is not really necessary (b/c most people refuse to speak anything but English to me) I can greet them in their mother tongue and I can communicate my basic needs/wants in KiSwahili. I often tell people I can understand much more than I speak, but either is quite an accomplishment when I spend most of my time using Kenyan Sign Language. I’ve come to the conclusion that I could stay here another 20 years and get the same ol’ stares but I def feel as if I’m more a member of my community than I was Dec 2011.

I am NOT the best at cooking African dishes. While I can light a jiko as quickly as some of the Kenyan mamas here, I have never cooked Ugali in my house and  my chapati isn’t the tastiest on the block. I’ve spent most of my two years eating rice/pasta dishes and if I’m feeling extremely lazy I make veggie soup J.  This is most I’ve cooked in my life.

I am a much better teacher than when I started. I know I know this is a given, people usually improve at any job with time and experience. I mean I did a little teaching before I left so I don’t think I needed much more experience with that. However, I do think I needed to learn more KSL as well as more about the culture of education here before I was able to become an effective teacher. I sometimes look back on my first few months of teaching (where I had the enthusiasm but lacked many of the skills) and I laugh because I know it was such a shock to the kids.  I’m silly…I enjoy laughing and dancing and talking to the students. I don’t want to just teach but also discuss. This is not a very common thing here and it took me a while to understand that. The students must have thought I was crazy with my very different teaching styles, but they learned to accept it and enjoy it and I can say I have seen some much needed improvements in some of their learning.

As much as I would like to consider myself integrated, I have failed at not looking like an American. When I go to the supermarket in town and people come up to me and say ‘Are you American? You look American.’ Hmm…Is it my trousers that I refuse to give up although most women wear skirts. I mean there’s just a get it done mentality that trousers give you that you can never have walking around with a skirt. Or is it my dreads that would never be seen on a woman in the village. While in the smaller towns If I’m not being called mzungu it’s ‘Rasta’ ha can’t just be Kia and I guess it’s safe to safe that I will never be truly Kenyan at least not in the village/smaller towns.

I have developed a voice I didn’t know I had before. There are many times in the staffroom that I find myself debating with the male teachers about human rights, women rights and children rights. I don’t really like labels. I never considered myself a feminist/ an activist/ or any other ‘ist’  but when people speak so negatively about a certain group or they are overtly oppressive because they feel they are superior…well it’s hard to keep quiet. I say my piece. I hear time and time again about how Kenya wants to be like America and I let them know that this may not be possible at least not at the pace that they would like if they don’t begin to acknowledge women as equal and capable individuals or if they don’t start putting actual effort in educating their future. I find that I don’t get as angry about these debates anymore, it’s their culture that they are deeply rooted in and unwilling to change at least in this area so what can I do? This voice also carries over to the market or matatus when people try to cheat me because of my accent. I am quick to stand up for myself and argue over a few shillings. When I first arrived I was like oh maybe they really need the money or it’s ok I have the money to give. Well guess what? I don’t think this anymore. After living as a volunteer for 2 years every shilling/penny/cent counts and I will not give anyone more just b/c I am from a country where everyone is supposedly rich. With all this said I do know when to shut up haha. I mean there are sometimes where things may be so far out of my control or it’s prob just safer to keep quiet.

I think that’s enough reflection for now. My goal is to blog every couple of weeks  until I go home, on things past and present but really  with my  blogging history who knows how that will go? Oh wait there is one last thing. I fail at keeping time haha.  I’m sure I’ve said it before but time is not very important here. A meeting that is scheduled to start at 8 may start at 11 or later and it’s no big deal. This is something that would urk me like no other but nowadays I take these extra few hours to workout, read, or play with the kids. I’ve realized that time is not as important as we think it is in the states. There is much more to life/living than rushing to a meeting  or event. It’s a lot less stressful to just go with the flow and know that the flow may take you on  some interesting adventures.